My Fear of Heights and a Hot Air Balloon

I've been terrified of heights for as long as I canit was up in the sky, only occasionally hearing the
remember and still I insist on white knucklesound of the burner as it blasted hot air into the
experiences.balloon above.
On occasion I've thought it'd be a great idea forFrom experiencing this serenity my focus turned
my family and me to ride in glass elevators, taketo the burner and feeling the heat of the flames.
rides on Ferris wheels (large or small), check outHappy with experiencing what I was, I began
revolving restaurants atop towers - not only isasking myself probing questions about my fear.
this alone terrifying, vertigo also gets thrown inWith each answer I would then ask "and what is
for good measure. Then there was my absoluteimportant about that?"
fear of flying which thankfully has been dealt withRemaining centred and controlling my breathing, I
successfully.continued to answer each question fully to myself
Hot air ballooning is a different kettle of fish. Nowuntil there was nothing left to ask.
I know hot air balloons fly (sort of) howeverFrom answering my own questions I discovered
there are no in-flight rations, flight attendants,my fear was based on the fact that there was
movies, headsets, or pressurized cabins. There isno jet engine, steering wheel, seat belts, escape
just a big balloon (also called an envelope - I paidchute and we were in a basket attached to a
attention during the pre-flight briefing), a basket, areally big balloon!
gas burner and a group of excited people. To meFrom those answers I then:
this was not flying, more like drifting and floating* Determined that the likelihood of disaster was
randomly above the earth.minimal to nil.
What possessed me to voluntarily take a hot air* Knew the present moment was the safest
balloon flight I'll never know.place for me.
A flight was booked and as luck would have it,* Future paced me. I imagined myself eating my
perfect weather conditions. We arrived at thechampagne breakfast with the other passengers
departure point on a cool, crisp morning beforeafter the balloon flight, and retelling my story.
the sun rose. The other passengers had already* Realised I was actually having an experience of
arrived and were eagerly awaiting the pre-flighta lifetime which I probably will never do again and
briefing before take-off.decided to make the most of it.
That was the good bit.Not only that, the captain seemed to know what
Fear washed through me, it became difficult tohe was doing (always encouraging), I knew the
breathe, and my heart was pounding rapidly. Itequipment was in great shape (I had a good look),
took supreme effort to keep my panic in checkand there was someone following the balloon in a
and instead, not wishing to put a damper onvehicle below.
anyone's enthusiasm, tried to appear asTaking several deep breaths, I refocused on my
nonchalant as possible.internal world and connected with peace again,
As time for take-off approached my fearsilently giving thanks to my years of meditation
intensified. Finally, as the ropes were releasedpractise.
from the basket and the balloon slowly made itsAt last I was able to truly enjoy this exhilarating
way upward, my knees turned to jelly and theexperience! The peace and tranquillity above the
urge to rid myself of the previous night's dinnerearth with the sun rising in the East, and the
became overwhelming.green rolling hills below was absolutely awesome -
Totally trapped I silently screamed as we roseI was in heaven!
higher and higher from the ground.Being in the present moment, focusing on
What did I do next to overcome this panic?controlled breathing, as well as becoming centred
I changed my state.helped enormously in dealing with my anxiety. Not
I remembered to breathe, and with that was ableonly that by asking the question "and what is
to centre myself (knowledge of meditation helps!)important about that?" got to the heart of my
to step fully into the present moment. It alsofear.
helped to shift my focus and become moreTry asking yourself that question sometime when
curious, about the purple hills I could see on thea need crops up. You might be surprised as what
horizon.you discover about yourself.
My focus then shifted to experiencing how serene