| I always knew my Oriental wife was Jewish; | | | | enjoyed meeting my aunts and cousins in Rome. |
| after all, she grew up eating Chinese food!I | | | | These experiences are very special and |
| grew up in a Jewish neighbourhood of | | | | memorable to us.While we cherish both |
| Montreal. My mother is Sephardic Italian and | | | | backgrounds, when we have to choose between |
| my father is a Holocaust survivor from | | | | them Jewish holidays and observances take |
| Poland. I speak Italian with my mother and | | | | precedence over Chinese holidays and customs. |
| Yiddish with my father and siblings. My wife, | | | | Belinda finds Judaism meaningful and she has |
| Belinda Cheung, was born and raised in Hong | | | | learned to love it more than Chinese |
| Kong and came to Canada when she was 17.I | | | | traditions. Judaism is central to us, and it |
| married Belinda in 1999. Our marriage has | | | | helps imbue our lives with meaning and |
| been working wonderfully well. Despite our | | | | direction..How did we get to this |
| cultural differences, our worldviews and | | | | arrangement? From the moment we began dating, |
| approaches to life are remarkably identical. | | | | we enthusiastically explored each other's |
| We are busy raising our two young children, | | | | cultures through visiting many ethnic |
| and our lives are meaningful and | | | | establishments and participating in various |
| fulfilling.Picture frames reflecting both | | | | cultural activities. Our goal was to broaden |
| Chinese and Jewish influences adorn our home. | | | | our horizons and to take the best of both |
| We are keen on learning about each other's | | | | worlds. However, as my parents were |
| culture. We make a point to learn each | | | | vehemently opposed to my dating Belinda |
| other's languages through tapes and books. | | | | because my religion prohibits intermarriage, |
| Although we are both fully fluent in English, | | | | we delved deeper into Judaism while also |
| my wife chooses to speak Cantonese to our | | | | examining other religions. We read |
| children, and I speak Yiddish. Between us, we | | | | voraciously on different spiritualities. We |
| converse in English. Our children identify | | | | attended Chinese churches, Buddhist and |
| with their Yiddish and Chinese names, in | | | | Taoist temples; took part in Jews for Jesus, |
| addition to their English names. Our elder | | | | Reform, Conservative and Orthodox Jewish |
| son, Asher (age 3), seems to handle the | | | | synagogues and events; visited a Sikh |
| different languages well. We make an effort | | | | Gurdwara, a Muslim mosque; and toured Israel |
| to be consistent in our use of languages with | | | | for a month. It was a long but worthwhile |
| our children. We expose them to both Chinese | | | | journey. Through it all, we inspired each |
| and Jewish games, as well as Chinese, | | | | other in our spiritual growth, and helped |
| Yiddish, Hebrew and English books, songs and | | | | shape each other's outlook on life. Belinda |
| videos.With an Italian mother and a Chinese | | | | eventually converted to Judaism after more |
| wife, I am likely one of the most well-fed | | | | than four years of exploring and learning. |
| guys on earth! On Sabbath, my wife often | | | | She genuinely loves Judaism. An important |
| makes "Chinese cholent," which I thoroughly | | | | reason that my wife and I have adjusted to |
| enjoy. She shops for Chinese mushrooms, lotus | | | | each other so well is that we had developed a |
| seeds, ginseng and various kinds of Chinese | | | | common vision for ourselves before we got |
| fruits and vegetables in Chinatown. I take | | | | married.We are now connected to a |
| pleasure in preparing Italian dishes, and we | | | | Torah-observant community where people are |
| both like Ashkenazi Jewish cuisine. One time, | | | | accepting of us and our Asian-looking Jewish |
| my mother-in-law assisted with cooking, and | | | | children. We were forewarned by the |
| we all had an authentic Chinese meal on | | | | rabbinical court which presided over my |
| Friday night. It was a delightful evening and | | | | wife's conversion that there would always be |
| a pleasant cultural shock to my parents. | | | | some Jews who, out of ignorance of Judaism, |
| Using chopsticks is still a challenge for me, | | | | look down at converts and their children as |
| but it only makes life more interesting!I am | | | | being "not really" Jewish. Thank God, we have |
| fascinated with Chinese history, language and | | | | not experienced this kind of debasement.We |
| culture. Belinda's roots are almost as | | | | hope that as our children grow up, they will |
| important to me as my own. I am constantly | | | | question, investigate and renew their |
| looking for ways to infuse more Chinese | | | | commitment to our Jewish heritage, and also |
| culture into our lives. Even my favourite | | | | respect and honor their Chinese roots. That |
| ties display ancient Chinese scripts and I | | | | they will carry their Jewishness into their |
| often wear them on Sabbath. The Chinese and | | | | own relationships and raise their children |
| the Jews have a lot in common in their | | | | with healthy and life-affirming values and |
| ethical teachings.We keep a kosher diet and | | | | practices.This article originally appeared on |
| celebrate all Jewish holidays, including the | | | | a member of the Media Network.Author of |
| holy Sabbath. We are grateful that my | | | | Chicken Soup with Chopsticks: A Jew's |
| parents, my Chinese in-laws, as well as our | | | | Struggle for Truth in an Interfaith |
| secular relatives and friends, are respectful | | | | Relationship. Discover more at Botwinik grew |
| of our Jewish observances. My brother-in-law, | | | | up in a culturally rich environment, speaking |
| who is Protestant, had joined us on several | | | | five languages. He attained a Master of Arts |
| occasions and experienced Sabbath and Sukkot | | | | degree in Political Science from McGill |
| (Festival of Booths), and even had a taste of | | | | University in Montreal. He worked for |
| matzah on Passover. We give lai-si (red | | | | Toronto's Welfare Department for several |
| packets containing money, decorated with | | | | years, before landing a job with the |
| characters and drawings symbolizing luck and | | | | Correctional Service of Canada. Jack's |
| wealth) to our children on Chinese New | | | | experience in dealing with destitute and |
| Year.We may catch a dragon boat race during | | | | under-privileged people, and his |
| the Dragon Boat Festival, or play with | | | | re-examination of his religious heritage, |
| Chinese lanterns around the August Moon | | | | significantly altered his outlook on life. In |
| Festival. When we are sick, we seek medical | | | | addition to speaking in public, and appearing |
| treatment and advice from both Chinese and | | | | on radio and TV, Jack helps couples in |
| Western doctors. Last year I had the | | | | interfaith dating relationships by listening |
| opportunity to meet many of my wife's | | | | and talking to them one-on-one. Jack enjoys |
| relatives and childhood friends in Hong Kong, | | | | spending time with his wife and young |
| as well as to visit her schools and converse | | | | children. |
| with her former teachers. Belinda also | | | | |